A Reason to Come Back
by mantisgirl
Summary: Halloween, 1981 Sirius goes to see Remus one last time. Remus gives him something that should force him home again.


**Disclaimer:** If you recognize it, it's not mine. The story's mine though :)

Sirius Black was sitting at home on Halloween night. He had an uneasy feeling in his stomach. Something was wrong. He had to do something. He had to go check on his friends. Remus wasn't in danger. In fact, odds were that he was the spy so there wasn't any likelihood that i he /i was in any trouble. Peter was in hiding too because he was the secret keeper for James and Lily. He was nearly as protected as James and Lily so he was probably fine as well. Still, he knew something was wrong. He got up and grabbed his leather jacket before heading out the door.

He had to go check on James and Lily. He'd had a feeling. Something wasn't right with his friends and he had to go make sure. He flew into Godric's Hollow on his motorbike. The second he landed, he knew something was off. There was smoke coming from their house. He sped down the road to see if there was anything, he could do to help. He hoped to Merlin that he wasn't too late. He pulled up in front of the house and found that Rubeus Hagrid was there already. Sirius looked up at the man who was holding his very tiny godson in his arms. The giant was crying. Sirius looked at the ruins of the house. He could see James's feet sticking out from under where the staircase had been. The young man felt his chest tighten with grief as he looked back to Hagrid for confirmation.

"Tell me this is just a decoy," he demanded the other man, his voice cracking harshly. Hagrid shook his head sadly, as he blubbered over the baby. Sirius let out a quiet moan, as if something inside of him was dying. In all actuality, that statement was more than true. James was his adopted brother, his only family. When James had married Lily, she had slowly begun to warm up to him. The two of them was all that he had. Remus was suspected to have jumped to the Dark Lord just as all the other werewolves had. Peter, well, Sirius had never been particularly fond of the rat. It suddenly hit him. Peter. He was the only one who could have done this. Something needed to be done. That coward needed to be put in his place.

"Hagrid, can I have my godson?" he asked. Sirius had begun to have this eerie sense of calm about him. The calm before the storm. Thunder rolled in the distance. Hagrid hesitated, he had his orders from Dumbledore to bring the baby to Headquarters immediately. Though the look on Sirius's face won him over, Sirius did have a right to Harry after all.

"Just for a moment though, Dumbledore's very specific in his orders," Hagrid mumbled through his tears, as he gently placed the sleeping baby into Sirius's arms. Sirius looked at the tiny, sleeping baby in his arms. He saw the cut on his forehead, though he didn't know what it was from, he used one of his hands and traced it lightly. Harry stirred lightly in his sleep. Sirius smiled at him. He hoped things would be better for the small child in his arms. He handed Harry back over to Hagrid. Sirius roughly wiped a tear from his eye.

"Take my bike, Hagrid, I don't need it anymore," Sirius said before turning to walk down the road. He had a new goal. Now that his family had been destroyed, he needed to find the cause of the pain he was in. He needed to find Pettigrew. He needed to say goodbye to Remus. To apologize. Peter was the spy. The Order had fallen in to stereotyping and Remus was the first to be thought of as the spy.

Sirius made his way through the town until he found a safe spot to apparate from. He apparated himself to just down the road from Remus's house. He slowly walked up to the door, not sure how Remus would take his arrival. He also wasn't sure if Remus knew yet. He hated being the bearer in of bad news. He wasn't sure why he hated it so much, but it never sat right with him. It probably had something to do with his aversion to expressing his emotions. Admitting something bad happened was admitting that it was real and that he'd have to deal with it. He heaved a great sigh and tentatively knocked on Remus's door.

Remus hadn't heard about his friends yet but the wolf inside him also knew something wasn't right in his pack. He'd just gotten up the courage to see what was wrong when he heard a knock at the door. His heart caught in his throat. He could pretend he didn't hear it. He could just apparate right out of his house. The person who was there wouldn't know. The knock came again followed by a familiar voice yelling out, "Oi, Moony, open up." It was Sirius and he sounded terrible. The werewolf looked through the peephole before opening the door.

Sirius was obviously upset. Anyone could tell that, but there was a deeper sadness about his friend. Something was horribly wrong. "What is it, Pads?" Remus whispered. He didn't want to hear the answer. He didn't want to know what happened. Sirius looked up to his friend, there were fresh tears in his eyes that were threatening to fall. "Peter."

It was the only word he could manage before he was overcome by the emotion he'd managed to keep at bay for the past hour. His body shook with sobs as he was let into Remus's house. Remus just stood by the door dumbfounded. He didn't even know how to take the news. He quickly closed the door behind Sirius and followed him down the hall to the living room.

The lycanthrope found his friend sitting on the sofa still crying. "Are…are you sure Sirius?" Remus asked quietly. Remus watched in horror as his friend nodded before looking up at him.

"I saw James," Sirius whispered back. Remus collapsed onto the chair across from his mate. He ran his hands through his hair. It was just so hard to fathom. Why hadn't… He picked his head up and glared at the person across the room from him.

"This…this is your fault," Remus snarled viciously at Sirius, "If you hadn't and then…" He got up and started pacing before turning violently on his friend who looked horrorstruck by what was going on. "How could you let this happen!" Remus finally accused before falling to his knees in front of his friend and breaking down into harsh sobs.

Sirius got up slowly and knelt down next to Remus. "I'm going to make this right," he said quietly. He gave Remus a hug and got up to leave. Remus started. Sirius wouldn't do something drastic, right? He couldn't take that chance. He quickly got up and followed his friend to the door. Remus turned Sirius around. Well, it was now or never. He leaned up and kissed his friend tentatively. Sirius's eyes widened slightly in shock. That was new.

Sirius pulled back and looked at Remus. "What was that?" he asked slightly out breath and very confused. He searched Remus's face for any sort of answer.

"A reason to come back," Remus answered simply. Sirius gave a small smile at the answer and nodded. Of course, he'd come back. There was no reason not to come back. With that, he turned and walked out the door to find Peter.


End file.
